Yep, tomorrow is October, and that means the Halloween horror review fest has rotated back around, and become an official Shmegalamonga tradition!
So, for today, as a lead in, let's have a recap of horror reviews I greedily jumped the gun on, to officially gather them up into this year's Halloween compilation.
It was quite a haul, and, it's easier to list the ones that didn't qualify as horror.
"The Man From Earth", and"Super".
And, I suppose "Hot Fuzz".,...even though it gets pretty grim in spots....
The rest, Halloween gold.
Well, another one that's not horror per se.
"Black comedy", I guess it would be...but...aren't black comedies just the thing for Death Day?
And the dead leaves season in general?
I think so.
Screw it, "Hot Fuzz", goes back in!
That's the flat out post-holidays stuff, now, for stuff that kinda cheated it a little in the other holidays...
All right, for the uninitiated, let's look at what we're talking about.
In Star Trek, Spock (or, another Vulcan), touches a person's head, says "my mind...to your mind...my thoughts...to your thoughts...", and then, he's essentially hacked into your brain.
Well...maybe if he's got some kind of electronic implants, but..he does this with just his hands.
Okay, maybe Vulcans have a super-duper nervous system that was genetically enhanced in their ancient past, and forgotten about, and now they've ritualized this nervous hacking power.
Only there's a problem, on several occasions, the meld is established by touch, and then maintained without it.
A nervous system with wireless mode?
Now, Seven Of Nine from Voyager has tech all through her, that I can let slide.
She can actually plug into things, and has a transmitter.
When you think about it, good-Borg are a modern upgrade of Vulcans.
Now, get this, in the Voyager episode "Unimatrix Zero", Seven is logged into Unimatrix Zero, a sort of secret underground VR for Borg drones, and Tuvok mindmelds in via her fleshy human forehead bits, and then also mindmelds Janeway in, and then, get this, Janeway's virtual self appears on the Borg Queen's viewscreen!
So...a mindmeld is a hack.
SO...they ought to be able to use Vulcan brains as wireless modems.
And if they could do that, then, why not clone Vulcan brain tissue, and have Vulcan flavored bio-neural gel-packs for the ship's computer?
Then, just imagine the shit you could do.
One of Spock's powers is going into a healing trance.
Well, imagine a person mindmelded to a whole bio-neural ship's computer, and pounding ship's power into a healing trance!
Everyone would instantly regenerate like Wolverine!
Ah, but get this, in the episode "Plato's stepchildren", a compound called Kironide bestows telekinesis.
So, imagine our Vulcan-gel-pak computer soaking in this stuff, and able to blast other ships with waves of kinesis.
Or, in combination with the healing trance, being able to self-repair the ship!
It quickly becomes clear, that magic does indeed exist in Trek, and if they properly exploited it, Starfleet should be friggin' invincible.
But, that'd blow the lid off, and disintegrate the (already strained) scientific plausibility, and turn the show into Charmed (in space!).
It all went to hell, really, with 60's SF writers, particularly Roddenberry, thinking there might be something to ESP.
Well, we fucking know better now.
If Trek is gonna live another 40 years, we gotta get that stuff outta there.
Or, else retcon an explanation.
I've got it down to 2...
1.) before the Vulcans nuked themselves back to the stone age, necessitating Surak's social revolution, their tech was a LOT higher, and they had reached the level of good-Borg, except, their implants were cloaked, and phased, and their cloaked-phased nanites pass along with their genes, and, even TNG-era tech can't detect them yet, and the nuclear war on Vulcan made everyone who knew about it die, and they got cultural amnesia about it.
2.) Matrix magic. They're physically plugged in in the real world, and can hack into other people's pods, and it manifests as "ESP", in the fake world.
All this would have to cover all the other touchless telepaths like Betazeds too....
They once attempted an explanation for ESP in Trek, I forget the episode, but...something along the lines of their brains can both imprint messages on, and receive messages from, the subatomic particles that buzz around, and pass through all of us all of the time.
Quantum phenomena happen on a massively smaller scale than neuron firings, and can't effect jack-fucking-squat.
In terms of scale, it's like saying a laser pointer can push the moon.
That's some full blown Deepak Chopra shit.
And if you don't know Chopra is full of shit, as Lewis Black would say, I want you to wear tinfoil so I can see where you are.
Also, particles can't explain why telepaths have felt things across light year distances.
Unless they're picking up fucking tachyons too.
See how ridiculous it gets?
Nope, either telepathy has to be booted out, or, we just have to accept Trek is a woo laden show.
It inspired a lot of computer geeks, and gave us internet, and I-pads, but...we've pretty much hit the wall for it being the blueprint for our future, unless some clever writers can give it an overhaul.
Well, the whole "atheism plus", deal is as good a gateway into this topic as anything else...
As you may know, what sickens me about "atheism plus", is it's biggest bullhorn bearers, are a bunch of witless dolts.
And, what makes them witless dolts, is they let "gender feminism", what I like to call radical feminsim, or rad-fem, infest and supplant their chunk of the larger atheist movement.
They're witless dolts for letting that happen, and they're witless dolts for believing in it.
So, now to really get into why I hate rad-fem.
First of all, they're not proper feminists, as far as I care.
Feminists actually care about equality, and, this should go without saying, care about women.
They've got some other "higher", "greater good", loony agenda going on.
They see all men as potential rapists, so...that makes half of all humanity a mortal enemy, and if you're warring on half of humanity, no fucking way you give two shits about "equality".
And, any woman who disagrees is labeled a "gender traitor", so, they don't give a fuck about those women.
So, so much for the "great sisterhood".
So much for those warm kumbaya bongo-thumping fuzzies.
So, if all that's a fucking lie, what the fuck DO they believe in?
It's like that Hannibal Lecter line, "they're weak, and unruly, and believe in nothing".
And what tells me they believe in nothing, is they have no argument to present, and no evidence to back that argument if there ever was one.
They've been asked for both, time and time again, and it isn't on offer.
You just get emotion-driven personal attacks.
And smear jobs.
Never a case for what they believe in.
Don't wait for it, it isn't coming.
Oh, they parrot out their little list of who they say they're out to protect, and woman and gays are always on there.
But their actual behavior says otherwise.
Exact opposite, in fact.
Bald-faced, shameless, guiltless, fucking liars.
And here's another question you'll never get an answer to.
"Say, how many truly oppressed women have you saved today?".
That line'll shut 'em right up.
They got nothin'.
They won't go to the middle east, they won't go to a trailer park, they won't volunteer at a women's shelter, they won't save anyone.
Don't hold your breath for that shit either.
Don't even wait for it.
They don't really give a fuck.
About women, about...people.
These are soulless, bloodless, heartless, narcissistic, largely white, mostly American, upper-middle-class, sheltered, over-privileged, softened-up, guilty, jealous, pseudo-liberals, who want to feel important, and never will be, so they need to throw themselves around, and hurt people, to feel like they're actually doing something, to fill the emptiness inside.
And it's not going to work.
They'll do their damage, the world at large will be the same, and they'll still be miserable pieces of shit, but they'll refuse the blame, and pick more enemies.
Probably, the end game, will be that they'll all turn inward on themselves, and eat each other.
In fact, I consider it most likely.
Let's hope they hurry the fuck up on that one.
Yes, I really hope they do.
For the sake of everyone they plan to hurt, I really hope they implode in a big fucking hurry.
And all of that, I've just described, is just the fairly recent intersection of rad-fem, and the atheist movement.
This shit isn't new though.
Like I said back in June, rad-fem has been parasiting on, and destroying other movements before.
First and foremost, feminism itself.
And, where "atheism plus", is the intersection of activist atheism, and rad-fem, rad-fem itself is the intersection of regular feminism, and post-modernism.
And that's the real fucking enemy right there.
And what does post-modernism believe?
Oh, it spouts off various lines of bullshit, but they all conflict, and it's like trying to nail fucking Jell-o to the wall.
Really, it's dressed up nihilism.
It's anarchy in a tweed vest trying to be respectable.
Problem is, it should have never been shoveled as a positive belief system in the first place.
Like atheism itself, it's absence.
Post-modernism is what you use to break down other bullshit.
"Watchmen", is post-modern, "Hitchhiker's Guide", is post-modern, "Monty Python", is post-modern, hell, there's an argument to be made for calling "The Princess Bride", post-modern.
That's fine, I live for that shit, it's the air in my fucking lungs.
What you can't fucking use it for, is wrapping a political fucking movement around it, and smuggling it past as an academic movement.
That's disingenuous bullshit masking...well, plain blinkered ninny-hood.
And, I'm aghast and dismayed that it was ever sold to people.
But, it was.
Post-modernism sold as positive towards...what, I don't know, because it doesn't really believe in anything, infested the humanities departments of colleges across this country, and this is exactly when you start to see this "gender studies", version of militant feminism crop up, and then the Andrea Dworkin types shat out of the cracks.
And now, we're reaping the headaches in real life, of what used to merely be intellectual masturbation of tenured assholes.
The weakness of po-mo, as with the rad-fem it spawned, is it has no stone cold logic to back its arguments up, it HAS no arguments, it openly and proudly eschews argument, eschews logic, indeed, it's anti-intellectual, and despises thought.
It's a "gut", philosophy as surely as Bushie conservatism.
It's "truthiness", with a hemp shirt and dreadlocks.
In fact, "truthiness", can be the only endgame for such a "philosophy".
Eschew reason, and you're fucking done.
My word for the whole sad, sorry lot, from now on, will be "post-modern drips".
You see 'em in entertainment too, post-modernism can aid in creativity, but when it breaks all the way down to nonsense that isn't even amusing anymore, it's just an expression of contempt, and that's "Tim & Eric Awesome Show", all over.
See my rant on that in the link.
It's not clever, it's a fun toy to play with when you're a teenager, but once you hit fucking 40, time to commit to a point of view (even if it's nihilism), or get out of my fucking face.
It's a mis-labeled pseudo-philosophy with absolutely no content whatever.
What do post-modern drips really believe in?
Which is fine, you should, but that seems to be all they believe in.
Fuck everyone else.
And, once you understand this, the whole "atheism plus", debacle falls into place, and can be understood no other rational way.
Egoism, pure and simple.
Sociopathy on the far ends of it.
Kinda like a Randroid, but without the free-market fundamentalism, actually.
At least Rand laid out her logic path, shoddy though it was.
I yearn, achingly, for a Randroidian logic train out of the post-modern drips.
Least that's something I can bite into.
The truthiness you get out of the A-plussers, is like paper pulp flavored oatmeal.
Bland, substance-less, and revolting, all at once.
...I wonder if it's planned that way..
...maybe it's really an evolved defense, like a skunk's spray, or a frog's pee...
..there's a thought.
More of a thought than A-plus ever frames its argument in, anyway.
No, even that gives it too much credit.
It's all just a post-modern drip.
From what bodily hole, I leave to your imagination.
Well, overall, it's been a blast.
...the Hembook parts, anyway.
So, firstly, I've accomplished my long deferred teenhood dream.
All I wanted, or expected out of life then, was to get like, a minimum of one copy each of the Hembooks, put 'em on a comic shop shelf, and have someone buy them, and love them.
I'd make pocket money, and that's it, I'd be done.
Wasn't too much to ask, I figured.
But, Kinkos-ing up those books, it turns out, is a bit pricey.
And, any time I was ever able to scrounge up the cash, I needed it for something else, usually computer repairs/upgrades/replacements.
Well, it took waiting for them to invent high speed internet, Amazon, e-paper, the Kindle, Amazon self publishing, Createspace, cheap photo quality scanners, etc, etc, etc, but my day finally came.
The teenhood dream is accomplished.
And, the teenhood dream was pretty much my childhood dream brought into tighter focus from a general blur, of getting any comic out there, so, that's the childhood dream taken care of too.
The books are out there, and...my life goal is complete.
Those copies of the books are out there in the world now.
An asteroid could squash me right now, and this rotten stinko world can't take that from me.
That's it, that's all I wanted to do.
I'm finally who I want to be.
I took my shot, I've done what I was on this Earth for, so now...well...
So...I'm done, I can pretty much be phased out now.
Go ahead, and hit me, asteroid.
Well, guess I'd best keep going then.
I suppose I could retell the stories of how it all started, how each book got created, what led me up to self-publishing, etc, but...those are told fairly well in the introductions to the books themselves, and you can peek at those in the Amazon previews.
And, the finer details, and more recent tales, are told in the related posts, so...I'll just list those in proper order.
So, as for the books themselves, and the road ahead...
Well, to me, in the larger plan of things, they're like how Robert Crumb published all his old strips going all the way back to childhood.
These are the old archives, and then we progress forward.
What, you think that old art is as good as I ever got?
Sheesh, gimme a little credit.
This was also the trial run to work out all the little technical kinks for the next thing...
So, yeah, that's the Harry chunk of things...
Aaand, while all that went on, I lost my grandfather, and his funeral came the day after my birthday, so, kinda zombie-walked through that. :(
Miss you, old man. :(
I'd say more, but I don't wanna get bawling again.
Anyhoo, the week in between his death and funeral, went to see "The Dark Knight Rises".
(And of course, we had that whole lovely aurora shooting surrounding that...*eyeroll*)
Buried myself in "my work", to take my mind off things, which is why I didn't mention it 'til now.
Well, not here, anyway.
So....yeah, always gonna remember summer 2012, for better and for worse.
No thumb twiddling, and lip biting this time, now after 3 months it's old hat. ;)
So, this one may or may not turn out to be superfluous, but, it represents something I have to compulsively remedy.
This compiles book 1, and book 2 together, because they were always intended to be a straight trilogy of tomes.
So, here's that...
So, as you may notice, this marks the 3 month anniversary of book 1. :)
Now, as to why this omnibus seemed necessary...
Wheell...as described in the release of Kindle book 4, and the retro-introduction to book 1, Amazon has file space limits for Kindle books, so I prepared a sextology of split-up volumes just in case.
Then, when I totally thought I was dealing with a sextology, and that the Createspace editions would be a compliment to them, a side thing, for much later, my mind was fixated on that, and, thinking the Kindle uploading thing would be sorted out, and fixed at any minute, I put out the split-up version of part one of volume 1 as book 1, and that pretty much committed me to putting out book 2 that way, but, when I realized Createspace had no such file limits on uploads, I totally wanted to keep (what was now) book 3, and 4 in their intended forms.
But, I always also wanted to do this collection to fix it.
All right, so, like I said last time, about Podsville, I dunno what I was going for, an angrier cuss-ier Cracked, or what, but, I got burnt out on the full-blown depressive negativity, and tried to shift it over to fun stuff, and...I gotta just do that, and not have it under a pretentious banner of some kind, and be done forever with these stupid label-eating chapter thingies.
George Carlin: Back In Town And here's where my fucking mind exploded. Turns out, in terms of mind-expansion, "Private Parts", was just that farty little test firework, "Back In Town", was the Disney World full on fireworks extravagana. Every line is gold, it's his masterpiece. Now, Carlin himself thought the preceeding one, "Jammin' In New York", was his masterpiece, and it is fuckin' great, but...this one was so much better IMO. Anyway, I didn't have HBO, but I did have an old 80's cable box with a tuning wheel that played out slack forever, and I could almost get the static out of Cinemax (hence the ability to watch boobie movies) and I could get the sound on HBO. And for Carlin, the sound is mostly all you need. So, yeah, going from his sitcom, to this, blew my friggin' mind. And this is just when he totally turned into the edgy Carlin, so I caught it right on the wave. Been a huge fan ever since. Hooked instantly. I owned the VHS tape of this as soon as possible. And when it became possible, I caught up on his material from "Jammin..", and "Doin it again", via the internet. Now, I have all his stuff on DVD. Man, I wish he'd gotten to do another 14 concerts. I had that gloomy alone feeling again when he died. Well, at least there was still "Last Words", to be published, and that gave me good closure. Well, here's a clip...
Review is here, but, I sorta lazily linked it, so here it actually is....
Yeah, this wasn't really goodbye.
What a great party though.
Fun little film.
Robert Englund was clearly having a blast.
And, it was a good apology for 5, which kind of fell on its face.
Well, I already ranted about my love for this series in the 80's ones.
So, ditto all of that.
And yeah, this one was a bit cartoony, especially compared to the first couple, and how scary they were, but....eh, Freddy couldn't scare us anymore, we'd grown up with the franchise, it was time to just go out with a bang.
I didn't mind this one being a bit silly.
Although, it did have its dark moments.
I went through a film snob phase of looking down on this one for a couple years, but I got over it.
5 is the only one that really lets me down anymore.
Well, it's like I said in the captions in "innerspace", I was trying to write my way out of depression.
That, and to silence critics who said everything I write is negative, and "hate filled".
Fuck writing for critics, they're shit.
They'll die forgotten.
They say the Wright Brothers/Edison/Columbus were laughed at, but does anyone remember WHO laughed at them?
No? All right then.
So, here's this stuff.
The stuff that doesn't give me nightmares. (Previously compiled in "life is just lovely")
Although, trying messily to write about shit I actually like did sort of evolve toward En-Mike-lopedia.
So...I got that out of it, anyway.
Thanks, critics, for bringing out the best in me!
Even if by accident, and knowing that if you had your way, I'd probably die in a sewer.
Other than that...thanks.
*Okay, I tried to be gentle there, but fuck "comfort", as an argument altogether.
Would you accept some Wall Street apologist saying that the robber-baron crooks who crashed the economy draw solace and comfort from their money, and it's mean of you to want to rip their comfort away?
No, fuck off with that.
And, while I'm on the track of kicking down emotion-based arguments, I gotta go add an asterisk to something that bugged me in part 7.
** Shit, the rant is there, but the videos have been killed.
Gonna have to fix that...
*** Arghh! Fucking PZ Myers again! I go out on this one?!?!
Didn't undo the creepy executive orders Bush signed as he was running out the door.
Didn't end wiretapping, and renditions.
Didn't repeal the US PATRIOT act.
Didn't end "too big to fail".
His Fed chairman is a douche.
What's the deal with continued drone strikes in Pakistan?
Nobel peace prize, and gives a speech on why we still need war?? Eh...that's more the Nobel committee's fault. Still...
The healthcare bill is a blowjob to the insurance companies.
His VP is a cartoon. Which...is better than a Sith, I guess...
Seems to be saving gay marriage for his second term, which I find to be a cynical and immoral gamble with people's lives.
Nope, I never bought into that the guy is magical, or superhuman, or Heaven-sent, or a messiah, he's just a president.
It is historic that he is the first black one, and that is a good move for this country, with its racist fucking history.
Like Ken Burns said, it opens America's third act.
And his existence pisses off the bigots, which I enjoy.
And I love that they're too chickenshit in public to say "nigger".
It's every other thing they can think of, that doesn't apply "Communist", "Muslim", "hates white people", that's a good one.
"Wasn't born here", that was some good crazy for awhile.
Donald Trump got on board for that shit.
Yeah, keep watching his shitty show though, America.
So...I dunno, how does it all even out?
I haven't had a president in my life, certainly not in my adult life who I'd give an A or a B.
So, let's shoot that clay pigeon out of the air right off the bat.
If the country were where it was after Clinton, probably anywhere from an F, to at best, a high D plus.
BUT, given what he had to work with to start...eh...a high C.
The things on that "cons", list really unsettle me.
But....I really think Romney is worse, and there's no good third party option for me to protest vote with, so...I gotta go with who I think the best choice is.
Also...there's that vengeance factor.
You gutless Libertarians out there who pulled the lever for Bush the second time, you gotta take some medicine.
8 years of hell for me, 8 years of hell for you.
That's just how it's going to go.
Eh, Maine is never a swing state anyway, so, my vote doesn't count for much.
I can basically do what the fuck I want.