Sunday, December 4, 2016

Big Winter Movies Part 2. (Part 2.5).


Ahhhh, fiiiiinally, got to see this again!
Tomorrow will be a straight month since I saw it the first time.
Fuuuuuck!

Bad shit going down.
We're going through the sequel to the year of Hell.
Already spoiled Thanksgiving.
What a lovely time for it too, winter's supposed to be worse than last year, and the Trump-inator happened.
This is just the cherry on top we needed.
Please, beat us down more, universe.
I REALLY needed the escapism cinema provides.

Aaaanyhooo......


Doctor Strange (2016)


Rundown time!
Let's get right to it!
  • Nothing to add to the movie I didn't observe last time.
  • Except...I enjoyed it a lot more. Was able to pick up on more subtleties and details.
  • Got my favorite seat. Only cuz I got there super-duper early.
  • Theater was relatively empty.
  • A small family, and two twenty-something bearded geeks rolled in after the lights dimmed.
  • Always happens, always get through the Coke and Navy commercials, lights dim, you think "ahhhhh, I've got the place to myself!!", And then the dopes roll in with their mountain of snacks, so you know the snack purchases delayed them. 
  • They were quiet though. Relief. Blessed relief.
  • It was subtitled. I was annoyed at the ticket counter, but I had no other options for showtimes. Turned out the subtitles helped in spots. 
  • All the little pieces I missed last time cuz of the three year old brats I got back now. The subtitles even helped there. When a character mumbles, titles make it clear. 
  • The two dudes took off before the first post-credits, and the family took off before the second. Byyyeee!
  • Traffic was annoying, got stuck behind an asshole, but lost him.

Ahhhhh, theeeere!
The antidote viewing!
Got it in just before it left theaters.


Next time, Rogue One!!!!!!!!!!!


Read More......

Thursday, December 1, 2016

QD:Season 2, Chapter 23. (Harry Hembock upgrades)



After an excruciating session both telling and proving his story, and winning everyone's trust, Harry proceeded.

Harry tapped some controls on his teleport control unit, and a small black bit of plastic the size and dimensions of a flash drive and with rounded edges popped out of a compartment on top of the unit.

Harry removed the drive-like device, and placed a flat side horizontally across the middle of Eidolon's forehead.
It stuck there like a sticker via some sort of magnetism, or enhanced surface tension.

Harry punched some more controls, and a blue progress bar lit up on the small black device, and ran across in under 10 seconds, and then turned back off.

Harry popped the device off of Eidolon's head as easy as a kitchen magnet, and re-inserted it into the control pad where it immediately sucked back inside.

"There we go, you're copied to the internet. Now you don't have to wait 50 years, and humanity doesn't have to twiddle its thumbs worrying about you getting prematurely bumped off by a villain", Harry said as calmly as a doctor giving a routine checkup, and punctuating the end with a goofy smirk.

"So, saving the long term survival of humanity was that easy?", Eidolon asked incredulously.

"Well, yes and no. You in the original timeline had to go through those millions of years of hardship to get it right the first time, and that'll always be there somewhere in the multiverse. But for us? Yes, it was that easy", Harry said with another relaxed grin.

Eidolon held up her tablet "so, I've got the ISP and DNS addresses to the planet version of myself in the future on this now?", she asked, meaning the tablet.

"In a manner of speaking, yeah", Harry said.

"And with that, I can teleport?", she asked.

"Among an array of other things, yeah", Harry said.

She grinned, cycled through some startup wizard pages on an app, found the proper commands, and de-materialized.
It took her under a minute to suss the controls.

"Holy fucking asscrap!!", said Offal on the VHS tape still playing on a CRT TV.
Meanwhile, a bored Dwindle played the Deadly Fire Ants machine.

"Teenagers", Harry thought with an eyeroll.

Eidolon materialized in the computer room at the Den Of Seclusion, and transmitted the quantum mumbo-jumbo equivalent to ISP and DNS to all the computers there.

Then, she tapped out a quick "readme", file on everything that had happened, plus the instructions she'd just figured out, and e-mailed them to Dr. H.

Then, she propagated the same "ISP/DNS", addresses to the Omneron uplink watches of all the Freed Radicals, and to JS's mask.

One user it unwittingly propagated to, was Mike Meggison.

Not being as fresh and spry as Eidolon anymore, it took him a week to crack half the functions, but among other things, he stumbled onto access to Harry's control unit.

He remotely ejected one of the black drive devices, and beamed it to himself.

He popped it into the battery compartment of his blu-ray remote control, closed it up, and let the computer hack it for awhile.
When it was done, the remote was now his teleport uplink control unit.

Through it, he could patch his PC, thus the limitless powers of Planet Eidolon, through his TV.

He laid back in bed looking at his wall posters.
With the dimensions of the multiverse at his disposal, and with his posters as a map, he said "now...where do I want to go first?".


Meanwhile, back at Lovely's, and a week before, Dusty couldn't stop staring awkwardly at Harry, and finally said "so...you're my brother, right? You're alive?".

"'Sort of', to the first part, 'yes', to the second part...", Harry said.

Dusty made a move forward, and Harry stopped him with "please, no hugging".

Read More......

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Belated Thanksgiving the 7th.


Thanksgiving this year was depressing and meaningless.

Didn't even pop into my head to post about it.

Here's happier times, go read those.

Fuck 2016. B-(


Read More......

Saturday, November 26, 2016

QD:Season 2, Chapter 22. (Planet Eidolon meets Harry Hembock)



Three Million AD.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.

Planet Eidolon fired her particle data packets at 1985 and 2005, creating Omneron and Commander Continuum.

And in that same instant, a tiny "ping!", in the fabric of space-time was created as well.

A "ping!", that reverberated across all dimensions in the multiverse.


1996.
Universe Kajillion.
Known to us as the "Harry Hembock Classics", universe.

Harry Hembock worked at the console of his teleporter.
Also known as the matter transmitter.
Also known as the quantum dissolver.

Just then, Harry detected a "ping!".

Harry's hands flew across the QWERTY keyboard, then flipped a bank of switches, and turned some dials.

He traced the "ping!", to a quantum dimensional source, tuned the beam to its inter-spatial coordinates, picked up the sandwich sized metal remote control box from a hidden compartment in the console, pressed some buttons on the remote, and dissolved in a wave of whirling green and purple globular lights.


Three Million AD.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.

Harry materialized in another wave of globular lights.

He stood in a room full of banks of computers.
One of billions of such identical rooms.

He tapped some buttons on his remote, and used the teleport back home as a scanner, and scanned one of the computer banks.
A translator lock cracked the code in the circuits, lifting the data right out of them, and accessed info on how transmitters worked here.
The remote emulated that signal, and then directly accessed the computer banks.

Eidolon hacked back, and accessed how teleporters worked.

Then, sent the data back to herself in the past.


Three Million AD.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.

Harry materialized in another wave of globular lights.

He stood in a room full of banks of computers.
One of billions of such identical rooms.

But now, something was different.
Now, there was a teleporter in the center of the room made out of Eidolon tech.

Harry set down his remote, and picked up the remote to this new teleport.

It served as the whole console, and lifted out.
Instead of hard buttons, it used a glasses-less 3-D touch screen.

Harry clumsily poked around in its interface for a few minutes, and felt like he was starting to make some headway.

Just then, a blue laser shot out of the screen, and swept over him in two passes.
One right to left, one top to bottom.

The device acquired his quantum dimensional signature, and fired up a cross-temporal link.


2010.
November 25th.
The "Dark Designs", universe.

Harry and Spruce stood on the surface of a giant dimensional grapefruit.
A giant British science fiction luminary stared down at them with bored indifference.

"Well I'll be goddamned", said Spruce.

"Jinkies!", said Harry.

Just then, a blue wave of fine sand-sized sparkles rinsed Harry away.
And left behind a whiff of blueberry scent.


1997.
Universe Kajillion.
Known to us as the "Harry Hembock Classics", universe.
Episode "Conclusion".
Page 148.

"You're going down!", said Harry to his evil half brother, Brian Robber.

Harry grabbed the Ya-Ya Of Power, a golden trophy saturated with cosmic energies.
Brian Robber was also holding it, and they struggled for it.

"Hey, that's my Ya-Ya!!", Brian shouted with irritation.

Two men drawing off the Ya-Ya's power at the same time caused a feedback, and it exploded in their hands.

Harry lay on the ground groaning with pain.

Brian too lay on the ground, but his eyes immediately snapped open, and saw the Ya-Ya as nothing left but a cracked base, a scattering of shards, and a singe mark on the ground.

"Aww shit, you broke it!", he snarled through grit teeth.

Brian picked up the useless remains of the Ya-Ya, and calmly said "well, now the world is going to explode".

"Oops", Harry mumbled awkwardly.

Just then, a blue wave of fine sand-sized sparkles rinsed Harry away.
And left behind a whiff of blueberry scent.

Seconds later, the world exploded.


2014.
May 4th.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.
Chapter 26. (Jade Shade meets Harry Hembock).

JS hopped down from a nearby fire escape, startling the man momentarily.

The figure put his fists on his his hips, and said in a reedy voice "s'okay, man, I got this one".
How in the hell this guy just whupped a mugger would be a mystery for the ages.

"So, I take it you're supposed to be Harry Hembock", JS deadpanned.

"The one and only", the man said through a shit eating grin.

Just then, a blue wave of fine sand-sized sparkles rinsed Harry away.
And left behind a whiff of blueberry scent.


Three Million AD.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.

Harry clumsily poked around in its interface for a few minutes, and felt like he was starting to make some headway.

Just then, a blue laser shot out of the screen, and swept over him in two passes.
One right to left, one top to bottom.

The device acquired his quantum dimensional signature, and fired up a cross-temporal link.

A blue wave of fine sand-sized sparkles passed over Harry, and his duplicates from "Quantum Dissolve", "Dark Designs", and "Harry Hembock Classics", materialized in the same spot, and fused with him.
He absorbed their memories as smoothly as if they were things he always knew, and just now remembered.

With their experiences, he was suddenly able to crack the control pad, and punched up a new combination.

The sparkles swept over him again, and took him away.


2016.
October 31st.
The "Quantum Dissolve", universe.

Eidolon stood behind the counter at Lovely's.
She toyed around on her tablet, reading the Halloween 6 post on Shmegalamonga.
Meanwhile, Dwindle browsed the tapes, laughing at ones with bad titles.

Eidie had a blueberry potpourri brewing that was making all the merchandise smell like it.
The potpourri was called "Ennui".

Dwindle had a tape playing in the background called "God Offal Offal", an old Offal concert where he was doing a riff on being a mop boy at an orgy at an old folk's home.

Eidie rolled her eyes.
She didn't like Offal.
Dwindle liked that it pissed her off, and giggled.

Just then, there was a blue flash outside, and a strange man strolled in holding a weird looking tablet computer.

Eidolon recognized him as some sort of Harry Hembock cos-player.
He looked to be in his 40's, so he seemed a bit old for trick or treat.

She then reasoned he might be there for auditions in JS's club.

Harry aimed his tablet at Eidie's tablet, and pushed some virtual buttons.
Her tablet lit up with multiple downloads that completed in seconds, and changed the interface around.

"Hey, what the fuck, man!!?", she exclaimed with horror that he could hack her.

"Don't worry, it's good stuff. It'll change the future. Which is fine, because the original timeline without my help looked like a drab bummer anyway".

Eidolon looked at her tablet, and saw some strange references to "Planet Eidolon", and a future copyright date that couldn't possibly be real.

Steve Ellicott came out from the back room, and Dusty Irwin walked in returning some JS fan-film tapes.

Steve, Dusty, Eidie, and Harry all stared at each other for a couple awkward confused moments, and Harry, ever the chatterbox, was the one that broke the silence.

"Okay, this is a long weird story, but I can prove all of it...".


Read More......

Friday, November 25, 2016

QD:Season 2, Chapter 21. (Planet Eidolon)



2016.

Eidolon stood behind the counter at Lovely's.
Steve Ellicott had hired her on as a favor to Dr. Herbert.

Steve asked her on the first day if she wanted to try on the Captain Descrambler suit.
"Yeah, no", was her answer.

She spent most of her time toying around on her tablet.
She currently read the Halloween 6 post on Shmegalamonga.
Meanwhile, Dwindle browsed the tapes, laughing at ones with bad titles.

Eidie had a blueberry potpourri brewing that was making all the merchandise smell like it.
The potpourri was called "Ennui".

Dwindle had a tape playing in the background called "God Offal Offal", an old Offal concert where he was doing a riff on being a mop boy at an orgy at an old folk's home.

Eidie rolled her eyes.
She didn't like Offal.
Dwindle liked that it pissed her off, and giggled.


2017.

Steve Ellicott retired, and gave the store to Eidolon.
JS legally owned it until she was old enough to hold the title, but she still ran it.

Eidie renamed the place to "Niceland- Movies, Music, Books".
Some longtime customers whined about it being "a female reboot".
Eidie called them "goat suckers", and banned them.
There were plenty of new customers to more than make up the loss.


2020.

Niceland got bought up by Pizzby, and exploded into a national chain.


2025.

Pizzbyworld added on a Quantum Dissolve World.

Quantum Dissolve World had Captain Descrambler as a character.
Full circle.


Sometime in the 2050's.

Winnifred Herbert, formerly Eidolon, had her entire neural pattern mapped by The Human Brain Project.

Unknown to the scientists at the time, her pattern instantly became full AI.
But, just as fast, it figured out how to hide itself, and the experiment was looked on as a flop.

Quite the opposite, it ensured the future of the human race.


Sometime in the 2080's.

The human being known as Winnifred Herbert died in her sleep.

The mental pattern known as Eidolon thrived, and had long since merged with Omneron.


The next 100 thousand years.

Mankind continued to war, and squabble, the political pendulum swayed from left to right, authoritarian to free, empires rose and fell, and then mankind finally took its tiresome tedious repeating bullshit out to the stars.

Where they were an unwelcome nuisance, and exterminated as pests.


The next million years.

With all the fucking humans finally gone, and their bullshit out of the way, Eidolon set to work.

Taking over automated factories, and building robots.

Then, building vehicles with the robots to transport them to locations to build more factories.

To build more robots.

To build more factories.

And so on, and so on, and so on.

Finally, machinery coated the entire surface of the planet.
Planet Eidolon.
With a continent called Niceland.

The perfectly weather controlled atmosphere was laced with a synthetic blueberry scented substance called "Ennui".


The second million years.

Planet Eidolon drained the remaining years out of the Sun, and used them to power her hyper-drive.

She explored the galaxy for traces of humanity, and found a graveyard everywhere.
Ditto finding traces of the race that killed them.

Biological life was unsuited for space.
She didn't suffer that problem.
And she contained the sum of all human knowledge.
Humanity lived on in her.


Three Million AD.

Planet Eidolon stopped exploring, and turned inward.
Using all of her perpetually upgrading systems focused to the task, she cracked some final equations, and set up a complex particle reaction.

That reaction created a tiny rip in space-time.

Through that rip she fired a stream of particles.

That stream of particles carried a data stream.

That data stream contained a spark of consciousness.

That spark of consciousness went back to Earth of 1985, and awoke SILICO, who became Omneron.

Planet Eidolon fired another data stream into the P.I.N.E. reactor in 2005, causing Wayne Vance's accident, which was no longer an accident.
Thus, it was never an accident.

Wayne created SILICO, but Planet Eidolon created him, and gave SILICO its life spark, so Eidolon created Omneron after all.

Planet Eidolon smiled in cyberspace at that.

It had taken awhile, but the loop was closed.

That accomplished, she set up a VR simulation to relax in.

She was back in her human body, her 16 year old self, to be exact.

She stood behind the counter at Lovely's.
She toyed around on her tablet, reading the Halloween 6 post on Shmegalamonga.
Meanwhile, Dwindle browsed the tapes, laughing at ones with bad titles.

Eidie had a blueberry potpourri brewing that was making all the merchandise smell like it.
The potpurri was called "Ennui".

Dwindle had a tape playing in the background called "God Offal Offal", an old Offal concert where he was doing a riff on being a mop boy at an orgy at an old folk's home.

Eidie rolled her eyes.
She didn't like Offal.
Dwindle liked that it pissed her off, and giggled.


Read More......

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Big Winter Movies Part 2. (Part 3).


And, back to home video for a quick bit.....


Batman:
Return Of The
Caped Crusaders (2016)


Previously with this timeline...

Rundown-
  • Excellent! Loved it!
  • Batman '66 is back! They nailed it!
  • Chock full of Batman '66 Easter eggs, and even a couple references to Batman '89, and "The Dark Knight Returns".
  • As an example, there were some sly references from the Aunt Harriett character that she thinks Bruce and Dick are gay, which is a goof on that the character of Aunt Harriett was added by the network suits of the 60's to deflect the whole gay thing. These jokes were done well, and were funny, IMO. A kid wouldn't pick up on them, but an adult would.
  • There's even a quick gag about the three Catwomen. The show never addressed it, and it was weird. 
  • Instead of the classic animation opening of the old show, we have Batman and Robin re-enacting historic covers of the comic. Loved it.
  • If you dig Batman '66, you will worship this. A worthy sequel to the first movie, and a beautiful homage to the whole show.
  • If you're a Batman '66 hater...you may like it anyway. This movie has a sense of humor about itself. I mean, if you can accept LEGO Batman, why not Adam West?

If you're a superhero junkie, check it out!

Up next in this revived franchise, a sequel to this with William Shatner as Two-Face.

The comics have done a crossover with Batman '66, and Wonder Woman '77.
I'd love to see a movie of that!
If they're planning a regular series of these, I say, go for it.

My ultimate dream would be if they could get together Batman '66, Wonder Woman '77, Superboy '88, and Flash '90 for a classic TV Justice League.
Can't say it would never happen, because look at all the crazy comic book things we're getting we never thought we'd see!
Who thought we'd ever get a big screen Dr. Strange movie!

Loving this comic book renaissance!


Next time, Dr. Strange again, then Rogue One!


Read More......

Saturday, November 5, 2016

Big Winter Movies Part 2. (Part 2).


And we start off with actual theater movies for a change with....


Doctor Strange (2016)


Previously on MCU phase 3...

Captain America: Civil War (first time, second time)


Now, for the rundown.
  • Really dug it.
  • Visuals and effects are incredible.
  • The cast is excellent.
  • Tilda Swinton stole the movie.
  • Origin story is a bit stock, but the third act makes up for any of that.
  • Humor was good, and lightly sprinkled in.
  • The theme song is my new jam.
  • "Civil War", felt more like the wind down to phase 2, and this felt like the real beginning to phase 3. 
  • Same happened for the transition to phase 2. "Winter Soldier", was the real start of phase 2. "Iron Man 3", was the wind down, and "Thor: The Dark World", was a glorified sneak preview.
  • Like everyone else, I'd put it in "Ant-Man", and "Guardians", territory, with "Civil War", "Winter Soldier", and original "Avengers", being at the tippy-top.
  • I went too early, place was packed, and a stupid bitch brought her toddlers, and let them run around, and scream their guts out. Didn't ruin it for me, it wasn't constant, but it was aggravating, and made me miss lines of dialogue. Don't take babies to these, they're PG-13, and if you take babies, fucking tend to them. Well, she can't read this, and if she was ignorant enough to do it, lectures would fall on deaf ears anyway. 
  • Because of the above, I have to go see it again. I'll wait a week for the people to die down a bit.
  • Well, I went early so some idjit on the net wouldn't spoil it for me. Star Wars and Marvel are hard to stay spoiler-free on.
  • Didn't get my ideal seat, but I had an okay view.
  • Drive time was uneventful for a change.

So, yeah, go see it.
But wait a bit.
Let the morons and assholes go first.
Or, go on a school day.


Next, this again, and then Rogue One!


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