Tuesday, August 26, 2014

The big summer movie recap. Part 2.







There they all are, and just like last time, sorted in order of goodness.
Best to worst, top to bottom.

Another pretty decent summer.
IMHO, not quite as huge as last year. I could have lived without some of these.
But, more on that at the end.

Recap time...

1. Guardians Of The Galaxy. (First, second, third).

Well, pretty obvious the winner of this one. My first ever triple-dip.
Nothing more to say here.

2. Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

This was more epic, but...Guardians had more heart. I'll be watching this multiple times on DVD though.

3. X-Men: Days Of Future Past.

Another one better digested on DVD.
Truly, the "Avengers", of X-Men.
The franchise is back on track.

4. A Dame To Kill For.

Enjoyable. Sick fun. Visual junkfood.
Will be collecting it.
First one was still better.
Safe to say, there probably won't be a three.

5. Edge Of Tomorrow.

Surprisingly good. Might even get this on DVD.

6. The Amazing Spider-Man 2.

They need a real freakish prodigy of a director to course-correct this franchise.
Otherwise, I'm out.

7. Godzilla.

Pretty good, for what it is. Spiderman, despite its flaws, had better character stuff.
And "Edge", was just plain better than Spiderman in acting and writing.
5, 6, and 7 on this list are really only ahead of each other by decimals.

8. Lucy.

Did good box-office, but wasn't really wowed by this.
Everything but 9 topped it.
9 is a huge dropoff.

9. Transcendence.

Fudgey wudgey.
Stinky winky.
Kucky wucky.
Poopy doopy.


Now, in summation, if I had it to do all over, I'd see the top three twice each, "Dame", once, and rent the rest.
And I'd sidestep "Transcendence", completely.

And, that was the summer of 2014.
Another big one for getting me out and around.

See you next year.
That'll have Avengers 2.
That should be interesting.

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Big Summer Movies Part 2. (Part 6.75)


Come on, you know what it is. You have to.


Guardians Of The Galaxy (2014)


Damned right. ;-)

I said I would...

Definitely go see it.
See it twice.
Thrice, muthfuckas!! Thrice!!!

I done did it.
Thought I was kidding, didn't ya?

The re-re-rundown.
  • Picked  up on lines I didn't before.
  • Picked up on background details I didn't before.
  • Choked up at parts I didn't before, and vice versa.
  • Laughed in different spots.
  • Had it all synced in my head to the soundtrack this time.
  • Basically, you get different stuff out of it every time. Truly the mark of a great flick.
Hell, I would have re-watched "The World's End", a couple more times too, but, money and life bullshit got in the way. Think I said so at the time.

And, that's the end! :)
Next, the big recap.


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Monday, August 25, 2014

Big Summer Movies Part 2. (Part 7)


And finally, the last one on the list....


Sin City: A Dame To Kill For (2014)


See here for the review of the first one.

Overall, I enjoyed it.
It's bombing hard, and the critics are shredding it, but I don't see the problem.

If you liked the first one, you'll like this one.
I think the 10 year wait raised expectations too high.
The bad reviews actually cushioned my expectations to the level they should've been.

I'll definitely be getting the DVD to go with the first one.

If you're a fan of the first one, go ahead and see it on the big screen, it's a visual feast.
Of junkfood, but a feast.

One nitpick....anything where Marv is still alive has to be a prequel to "The Hard Goodbye", but there's no way in fucking Hell "Nancy's Last Dance", could happen before "The Hard Goodbye".

So....is Frank saying "fuck continuity!!"??
Or....is there a slot within "Hard Goodbye", it can squeeze into?
Guess I'll need to watch the DVDs against each other when "Dame", comes out to buy...

My other nitpick...I can never get enough Rosario Dawson.
More!! More!!!

Hmm, yep, I liked it, but didn't love it.
I enjoyed it a lot more than the "meh", films, but "Guardians", "Winter Soldier", and "Future Past", are still in my top 3.

Anyway, that kills the list, but tomorrow, one more little thing to do. ;-)

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Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Big Summer Movies Part 2. (Part 1.5)




The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)


Meh.

See here for my review of the first one.
About the same.

Kids would like it.
I also agree with a friend who said the Raimi ones are silver age, and the Webb ones feel more like 80's Spiderman.

Still....nothing really special here, it's pretty effects layered over one of the old cartoons.

After the greatness of Spider-Man 2, their part 2 had to at least TRY to hit it out of the park.
They just crammed it full of shit like Spider-Man 3.

It's not as horrible as the bashers say though.
It's just...meh.
I wouldn't recommend it, and I'm glad I didn't waste theater money.

Anyhoo, that fills in the lost puzzle piece of the summer preview.

Up next "A Dame To Kill For", for really, really sure.


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Sunday, August 17, 2014

QD:Season 2, Chapter 2. (Zone Dweebies Addendum: Revenge of the Cyber-Vixens)



Chokecherry knocked on Karen Stevens's front door.

Karen answered, and recoiled in shock.

Chokecherry smiled, and said "it's me, I kicked your stepfather's ass with a field-hockey stick seven years ago. Remember, sweetie?".

Karen was still staring, transfixed.

Chokecherry looked worried.
"Fuck, you didn't repress the whole thing, did you?".

Karen's eyes welled up, and she lunged forward, and hugged Chokie.

After a minute, Chokie finally said "well, are you going to let me in, or what?".

Karen let her in, and they talked over tea.


Karen mentioned she saw Chokie on Krazyfool show.

Chokie replied with a bored mumble "yeah, I thought it really sucked".

Karen said "maybe it'll be better next time".

"Next time? Fuck that", Chokie said with a derisive snort.


Chokie gave Karen a present she had brought in a shopping bag.
It was an outfit, with some accessories.

Karen let out a happy gasp when she saw it.


Forty minutes later, Karen had it on.

Thigh high black latex boots.
Green nylons.
Black bikini bottoms.
A thigh slung gun holster with gun.
A green tube top.
Elbow length black latex gloves.
Black lipstick.
A metallic green pair of visor sunglasses.
Hair colored green with a spray-on coloring.

The outfit of Zoria Bacillus.

Completing the ensemble, was a metal rod as long as a basball bat topped off with a blue orb made of a hard plastic imitating glass, and lit from within by a small diode light.

A replica version of Zoria's time wand made into a practical melee weapon by Dr. H.


"So, who's my character exactly?", Karen/Zoria asked, lazily twirling the wand/club like a baton.

Chokie thought for a bit, reassembling it on the fly from faded memory.
"Leseee...time traveler from the year 4000, Harry Hembock stole her time-car, she modified her time wand to go after Harry, hunted him down, and became his fuck-buddy. Yeah, that's about it".

Karen/Zoria grimaced, thought a bit, and said...
"That sucks. She's some loser's sex slave? Okay, I decree she snapped out of it, told him to fuck off, and left, and became her own crimefighter. In fact, she went back in time, and undid that whole stupid relationship. Now, she's me. There!".

Chokie chuckled "guess we're both fictional exes of the little gnome, eh?".

Zoria changed the subject.
"What do we do know? Go hurt some rapists, or what?", she said, brandishing her new wand/club for emphasis.

Chokie smirked.
"I was thinking we could pay a surprise visit to your real ex for a start".

Zoria grinned wickedly, holding the time-stick like a samurai sword.
"We don't have to go to him, he'll come to us. He's got the kids, and he's an hour late".

Chokie smiled, sipped her tea, and wondered if Jadie's membership drive was going as smoothly.


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Friday, August 15, 2014

Flicks I've watched (Part 40.5)


Part 40.
Then this one goes in-between, then...
The End.


So, here's the real end of this series...


Batman: Assault On Arkham (2014)


I said here it would be a fitting capper, and it is.
Batman was my first comic, Batman was my first VHS, it/he should be my last "flicks I've watched", review.

So, let's recap the other DC animateds for the 2013-2014 period.
This one?
Excellent.
Best yet.
I'd even put it better than "Dark Knight Returns", or "Under The Red Hood".
Yep, that good.

I'd seriously put it up there with good animes like "Ghost In The Shell", or "Vampire hunter D: Bloodlust".

It's an interquel (in-between-quel) to the games "Arkham Origins", and "Arkham Asylum".

And it is nooooot for little kids.
Nyeeooo-ho-ho-hooo!
Nooo!
Violence, death, blood, decapitation by explosion, profanity, obscene gestures, sexual references, heavily implied bedroom scenes, references back to the bedroom scenes that remove all doubt, all that's missing is actual nudity.
Personally, I'd give it an R.

I think they used all the stuff they gradually got away with in the last ones to build to this one.
And, I've got no problem with that.
Unlike "Superman Unbound", this wasn't confused as to its audience.
They're in full on adult audience mode for this one.

Anyway, Kevin Conroy is back as Batman, Princess Bubblegum is Harley Quinne, and some guy I've never heard of is Joker, but does a dead-on Mark Hamill.

Batman is in this, but almost as a guest in his own movie.
This really focuses on The Suicide Squad, which Harley is recruited into.

The Suicide Squad is gathered together, and tasked by Amanda Waller with breaking into Arkham Asylum, and retrieving a gizmo, and also stopping Joker's dirty-bomb plot.
Hi-jinks ensue.

It's kind of "Escape From New York", with Batman characters, and betterer.

Buy, don't rent.

And, that's the end.
Good one to go out on quality wise too.

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Halloween is canceled.



Oh, I'll acknowledge the holiday, and maybe cobble together some little thing for it, but the big marathons just take too fucking much out of me, and I just plain don't want to do it this year.

I become more and more cosmically aware of everything I do that isn't Jade-Shade being a time suck away from Jade-Shade.

Every single flick I watch, I can feel the time sucking away, and it hurts more every time.

I really felt it last Halloween.
That was so grueling, it...kinda wasn't even fun.
I was satisfied with the results, but man, what an endurance trial.
It cost too much.

While I'm at it, no more Bingewatches.
"The Shield", and "Battlestar Galactica", will just have to go wanting.

I said it in "Post-Halloween holidays announcement", I gotta shave this shit back, plus, it already served its purpose in helping me create Jade-Shade.

I only kept doing it past Halloween out of compulsion, but my subliminal mind eventually guided me to the resolution of all those movie/comics quests (that I compiled on my birthday), and it all feels complete now.

But, what really finished it off, was "Rewind This", and "Adjust Your Tracking".
Those two little movies accomplished what I thought the movie blogging was doing.

"Adjust Your Tracking", really clinched it though.
There's a guy in that who's turned his basement into a perfect replica of an old-timey rental store, and at first, I admired the guy, and had a dreamy fantasy of just doing that forever.
Literally living in a video store, and watching the tapes, and making snarky wisecracks about the flicks to anyone who comes over.
Then I realized, that's always been my dream.
Then I realized, shit, I've tried on some level to make my blog that....but it's a time suck.
I got shit to write.
It would be so much fun, but I got shit to write.
I can do one or the other, not both, sacrifices must be made.

Shit, writing this fucking post is a time suck.
Gotta wrap it the fuck up.

So, yeah, let the "Rewind This", and "Adjust Your Tracking", guys do that shit for me.
I can pop those in any time to remember that world.

As for the big MISSION of Halloween (see here, and here), look, James Randi has devoted his life to debunking, Penn & Teller are kind of taking up his torch, and if it's vengeance on bullshit I want, Jade-Shade is all about that, so why fuck around with extraneous side-versions of it?

As for movies, I got one more to cap off video reviews.
And it's appropriate for a capper too.
You'll see.

Exceptions will be, first, summer movies, I'll of course finish those off.
Only one more left on that anyway.
I wanna collect the documentaries on my list, and talk about those.
And, I still like bragging about my Christmas hauls.

I'll do another early En-Mike-lopedia of this summer's stuff in September, and that'll be it.

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