Things I don't do- remaining thoughts.

In the last one, I had a good head of steam going, and a sub-topic came up I feel like digging into a bit.

I threw out this observation...


Too much dumb goofy shit in this culture you're supposed to FEEEEEL.
Dumb and goofy if you're LUCKY, usually it's fucking revolting and horrifying.

Well, as I'm cursed with remembering everything in my whole entire life, as I typed that, an example sprung immediately to mind.
In exactly the same way that "it's what you DON'T do", popped into my head, and became such an earworm that I had to finally publicly strangle it to death over the course of 4 posts.

I didn't crowbar it into the post I was typing, because it would've fucked up the flow, so now, here it is split off.

Okay, so it starts like this...

One time, I sat down, and watched an episode of "my so-called life".

Now, if you don't remember "my so-called life", you're fucking lucky, and you might even want to abandon this post right now to spare your sanity.

Okay, of those of you who stayed, I continue...

Now, "my so-called life", was this horrible TV show in the 1990's about whiny, unpleasant teenagers created by the same people who did "Thirtysomething", which was about whiny, unpleasant Baby-boomers.

Okay, here's the breakdown.

Claire Danes plays the main character, a whiny dumb girl, and despite her playing an awful, whiny, dumb twit of a character, I wouldn't have minded very much fucking her in the mouth.

Jared Leto played the male bimbo the Dumb Girl was in love with.

Brian Krakow played the twerpy nerd who REALLY wanted to fuck Dumb Girl in the mouth.

Then, there was Dumb Girl's dumb awful mother, and Dumb Girl's dumb awful friends.

There was no quest for treasure or nothin' these people just sort of existed, and mindlessly bumped into each other like wind up toys.

No one was sympathetic, they all needed some severe killing, which makes me flash back again to "Freddy's Nightmares".

The critics raved about this piece of shit, but to me, based on just the commercials, it always looked like a piece of shit.
But, I guess I just hadn't learned to 100% trust in my own critical faculties yet, so I caved into pressure from dumbass critics, and watched this fucking thing.

So, in this particular episode, Dumb Girl is all dumb and bubbly about something dumb (probably prancing off to fuck Male Bimbo), and then Twerpy Nerd makes some snarky cutting remark about what she's being all bubbly and dumb about being dumb, to which Dumb Girl retorts "you dissect everything until it doesn't EXIST!", and storms off.
Twerpy Nerd then recoils, as if stricken, as if to say "wow, she sure told ME off!".

And I could tell that the audience was meant to react like "YEAH! You sure told him! You tell him girlfriend! Uh huh!".

Then I knew once and for all who the ideal audience for this shit was, and I knew for damned sure what worthless shitty hacks most critics were.

Y'know how a couple episodes of South Park ago, Stan started to see everything as shit?
Yeah, happened for me right about there.
Shit pretty much started spraying right out of the screen.

Anyway, that one line of awful dialogue encapsulates for me everything that's wrong and dumb in our culture, and indeed the other human beings I typically get inflicted with.
Or used to, before I bailed out on the whole wretched disgusting mess.

I'll start by simply responding to that crap with "bitch, if it doesn't exist after dissection, it NEVER fucking existed, you vapid little hobgoblin from the fevered mind of a horrible hack".

I guess "it's what you DON'T do", was my real life moment like that.
That's how it ties in.

And that's this culture.
Wave after wave of shit that never fucking existed, and you're either supposed to mindlessly join in on the play-pretend, or babysit those that do.

I could almost buy into it, if it were FUN play-pretend.
That would make sense.
People avoiding reality, if they're gonna live in a fucking dream world, go the whole nine yards, spaceships, lasers, wizards, the whole deal.
But no, that's not what countries typically do.
Their play-pretend is ugly shit.
Ugly dumb boring shit.
Like, religion, like patriotism, like, consumerism.
It's all a smokescreen of lies, the world it makes is a snowjob that brainwashes and enslaves you, and to top it off, you're supposed to think it's all fucking great.

Well...if you want ME to think it's great, where's my fucking robot butler, and redhead hooker painting chocolate on her tits?

What, you could bend the fabric of reality and sanity to such an absurd degree that you could make Claire Danes the de-facto star of Terminator 3, but no hooker/robot for me?

It just just doesn't make any sense...
Eh, it isn't meant to.

So, yeah, back to the topic, right, so the Wikipedia page says about Twerpy Nerd...

Despite his high IQ and demonstrated perceptions/insights into other characters, he lacks emotional intelligence and is often socially awkward and self-righteous.

I'd read about that whole "emotional intelligence", shit somewhere once before, and often worried that I lacked in it.
Probably why that line stuck in my head.
Took it to heart maybe.
Shouldn't have.
I've now concluded I know pretty damned well how people tick, and in the case of dumb people, I don't really fucking care.
It's not that I don't know, I just don't care anymore.

That's what the last post was about.

"Socially awkard", as a teen?
Um, yes, and no.
Sure, it's awkward to be put into a setting you're out of place in.
Like, being a Jew at a Klan rally would probably be fucking awkward.
Guess what, they don't go to Klan rallies, neither do I.
I was never like "oh, I wish I could go to a stupid party, but I'm just so awkward".
No, they were like Klan rallies to me, I just didn't go.
Didn't even occur.

Was it awkward trying to associate with the dumb boring shit dumb people were talking about?

If I ever forced it, but I just realized it was dumb, and didn't force it.

For the longest time though, I thought there might be something wrong with me, and tried to find ways to "fix", myself, and that only served to make me sick.

That's what it does, that's all it does, and I think that's why so many people are on anti-depressant meds.

This culture wants you sick.

And that's what that shitty show was shoveling.
"If you think Claire Danes is dumb, you're bad, fit in!".

This is why I wrote "there's nothing to know", if you see it my way, you're not wrong, you're not broken.
You're not lacking in "emotional intelligence".
Someone with full blown aspergers, maybe, but I'm doubting even that shit.

I've got plenty of damned emotions, I can read other people's emotions fairly well, if you're reacting to my emotions in these posts, so can you.
Who are we fucking kidding?

All that's left is the babysitter shit.
I consciously decide I'm not doing it.
I could, but it makes me want to vomit and then die.
So, I'm not doing it.
I'm not "crippled", because I won't do these things.
And I'm willing to bear the consequences.
Always have been.

How nasty the consequences have been proves my point about people.
All the shit I've gotten, and these people think they're good.
To this day.
So, who's got "emotional intelligence", again?
Hmm?
Yeah.
Okay.

Y'know, I think it really comes down to, I think it would just simply comfort people, if people like me were a disease.
Doesn't matter the hell we go through, as long as THEY feel good.
As I've said before, fuck your comfort.
Fuck it.


Oh, and on that score, I remember one of the critical blurbs in one of the ads that made me gag.


"If you don't like this show, you were never a teenager".
Oh, gosh, I guess not...
*Eye roll*
Like I said....

So, that's that little side road.
And, I'm done.