"You play a good game, boy!!"

"But the game..is OVER!!".

Well, like I said last time, we've gone from a mad scientist specializing in zombie-making, to extraterrestrials, now, the guy who bridges the two families of monster by being both, simultaneously.

The Tall Man.

Heavy spoilers in this one, bail out now if you don't want to know.

Phantasm

The film-

Saw this one second, and the second one first.

It barely matters the order you watch these in, the plot-line is pretty much a 4 dimensional hyper-shape.

It'll mind fuck you no matter what sequence you attempt it in.

Um, okay....a kid's parents die, he's being taken care of by his big brother, and there's also the family friend, Reggie, an ice cream man, and they gradually unravel  the weird machinations of "The Tall Man", a weird old guy who runs the local mortuary, and who may have been involved with the death of the kid's parents (he is).

The Tall man dispenses with subtlety pretty quickly, and establishes himself as a sort of Dracula figure, sending weird Jawa-like henchmen after the trio of heroes, who (the Jawas) turn out to be somehow created from the bodies of the dead, and have mustard for blood.

If I recall correctly, the big brother dies, and shows up again as one of these.

 Our heroes infiltrate the mortuary, and are repeatedly attacked by Jawas, gas-mask men, and flying polished chrome balls that have various weapons and gizmos that pop out.

Chief among them, forked knives, and a drill that sucks all the blood out of you through your head.

Also, The Tall Man and the Jawas enter and exit our world to a whole other planet resembling Mars via a dimension gate that looks like two metal poles of the same polished quality as the balls.
Sort of resembles a big tuning fork.

Hence establishing Tall Man as an extraterrestrial.

All of this stuff would, of course, make a great video game.

So, all that happens, then a weird ambiguous "is it a dream?", ending straight out of "Nightmare On Elm Street", and then this thing cliff-hangs for a decade.

Weird dreamlike film, very creepy, you'll dig it.
Just don't try to make too much sense of it all.

The history-

Like I said, I saw this one second...and it didn't illuminate much.
It was kind of a trial run for the first sequel.


Phantasm II

The film-

The first one that I saw, and it's pretty goddamned good.

Okay, so, it's six years later, the kid, Mike, is a teenager now, Reggie is still with him, there's a girl with a psychic link to him (Mike) in dreams who later becomes his sorta-girlfriend, and the Tall Man is flat out destroying whole towns, and they're all on his trail.

Like I said, Tall Man abandons subtlety after awhile, and just fucking goes for it.

So, they track him down to another mortuary, and there's a big rematch with him, the Jawas, and the balls, and it's another weird cliffhanger ending.

In this one, we learn of the Jawa making process.
Tall Man embalms a corpse with the mustard stuff, and it comes back as a zombie, minus the rot, then the zombie is put in a metal can full of goo, and taken to the alien planet, where the increased gravity crushes it down into a Jawa.

Toward the end, Mike puts acid in the embalming fluid (aaaciiid!!) and then jabs the probe into Tall Man, embalms him with the acid-y mustard, and dissolves the shit out of him.

But...he comes back in the weird cliffhanger ending.

See, each one of these answers some questions...and then raises new ones.
You never get the whole puzzle, and you're probably never going to.

So...it ended up being another 6 years to the next one of these....

The history-

Same uncle loaned me the VHS of this that loaned me "Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2".
Happy times.


Phantasm III: Lord Of The Dead

The film-

Okay, this one picks up immediately after 2, and we see a new Tall Man come out of the dimension fork, pick up the body of the dead one, and throw it away back through the dimension fork.

That's how he comes back, and we learn more of this later.

Meanwhile, Jawas have munched on Mike's girlfriend, so that's the last of her, and then Reggie threatens (the Tall Man) to blow himself and Mike up with a grenade, but Tall Man says he wants Mike in one piece, so he lets them go for now.

So, we jump ahead a couple more years, and Mike is seeing his dead brother come to him first in dreams, then as a ball that morphs into him.

Tall Man kidnaps Mike through a dimension fork, and Reggie sets out on the road to find him, and finds more destroyed towns.

He teams up with a little black kid, name of Tim, who wields a frisbee with razor blades hot glued to it, and several adventures transpire, culminating in yet another rematch with the Tall Man with yet another inconclusive ending.

In this one, we learn how the balls are made.
Tall Man cuts out the higher brain of a Jawa, and puts it into the ball, while the brain stem runs the Jawa.

So, he gets two monsters out of each corpse.

Somehow, Mike's brother, Jody, has become a good ball, and figured out how to project his human self for short spurts, as well as projecting dreams.

Also, we discover Tall Man is a golden ball with a closet full of spare bodies like the ghost-suits in the Pac-Man cartoon.
This is really how he came back.

Also, somehow, Mike is a Tall Man, and has been all along, as he discovers when wounded that he has a gold ball in his head, and mustard blood, thus, presumably, Tall Man wants him for an apprentice/replacement.

I..can't remember if it was in 2, or this one, but Reggie constructs a quadruple barreled shotgun, and by 2 and 3, he's pretty much the same character as Ash.

Of course, Bruce Campbell and Reggie Banister would work together on "Bubba Ho-Tep", helmed by the same director as the Phantasms.
So, we kinda had a "Ash meets Reggie", moment.

Anyway, they fail to rescue Mike, and he wanders off with Tall Man, and we're led to think Reggie and Tim are doomed in a trademark fakeout Phantasm ending.

Yeah, see, I gotta describe these ones more, because they're...tricky...the convoluted nature of them is their selling point.

Is it good?
Ehh, yeah...I liked 2 better, but they maintain a general quality.

They're brainier and more interesting than say...Jason.

Anyhoo, another 4 year gap to the next sequel....

History-

Rented it, saw it.


Phantasm IV: Oblivion

The film-

More misadventures, and failing to defeat the Tall Man.

This one, we learn more about the dimension forks, and their connection to tuning forks.

Turns out regular tuning forks can stun or kill balls.
They have an effect on Tall Man and Jawas as well.

Also, time travel is introduced, and we see Tall Man as a 19th century farmer named Jebediah Morningside who constructs a primitive version of the dimension fork, enters it, and comes back out transformed into the Tall Man.

So, we get the origin story, such as it is.

Lotta dimension hopping in this one, again, the forks take center stage throughout this one.

The Jawas and balls, not as much.
Although, all of a sudden, the Jody-ball has turned bad, and is helping Tall Man with his efforts to get the Gold Ball out of Mike's head.

He does so, but somehow, Mike survives this, but near death, and Reggie goes after Tall Man through a fork...and another fuckin' cliffhanger.

And..it's been 13 years, so...I think we're done.

I like this one the least of the bunch, but, it's still interesting.

Not as scary though, especially when all the secrets are given away.

The history-

I own the VHS of this, and it's still kicking around somewhere I think.
I mighta thrown it out, I dunno.
I don't feel like looking.

This, and/or Jason X were the last tapes I ever bought.

Wal-Mart was clearing their shit out dirt cheap.


So, that was the Phantasms.

Almost done with the franchise ones, promise.

Up next, the 90's bring the pain.