Superhero TeeVee Three!!

So, after "Superhero TeeVee Too!!", Hyla reminded me of a couple I forgot, and that made me remember a couple more, then he remembered some more, and we bounced back and forth, next thing I know, I had another big list on my hands, and couldn't believe I forgot that fuggin' many.

So, here we go, starting all over again from the 70's...


The Sixth Sense

The show-

Um...interesting as hell, I dug it when I saw it, it's hard to nail down....

Okay, imagine X-Files, but it's just one guy, and he's mildly psychic, like, Oija board psychic.
Then, the cases he goes on are out of Scooby-Doo, but the ghosts are real.

All right? NOW, imagine, his powers gradually getting stronger, and then the show essentially mutates into Doctor Strange.
The Disco Doctor Strange.

Yeah! Now you're interested!

Yep, this is actually the show we might have gotten if the Dr. Strange pilot had taken off.

And now, on top of all of that, you've got Gary Collins from "The Home Show", and more recently, night time infomercials, as the main character, Dr. Michael Rhodes.

Sound good? Damned right it does.
Or, at the least, you're curious.
Good, get hunting.

The history-

Okay, now this is weird, and I've never heard of this being done before, or since...

"Sixth Sense", and "Night Gallery", were on the same network, and...I don't know the fine details of the business deals that went behind this, but to fluff up their episode counts for syndication, "Night Gallery", and "Sixth Sense", were smooshed together.

SO, if you got ahold of "Night Gallery", and started watching, and then got to the last couple seasons, and you started wondering "hey...what happened to the anthology format? Where's Rod Serling? And why is Gary Collins the guest star every single time?".

Well, now you know.

And that's what made/makes this show a bit tricky to find.

Aaanyhoo, I caught it as pseudo "Night Galley", episodes on Sci-Fi Channel.


The Tomorrow People

The show-

A BBC import.

Um...well....it's Dr. Who meets X-Men, with kids, essentially.

Like in X-Men, kids start manifesting powers when they hit puberty.
And like with X-Men, some of these kids have gathered together, and have a base, and have equipment that can scan for new "Tomorrow People", and help them with their development.

They also work with the government, and protect the world from bad aliens, like Dr. Who does.
And, they're members of a "Galactic Confederation", so there's some Trek in there.

Meh, *wavey hand*

There was a remake in the 90's, that's the second image in the graphic...

The history-

Saw reruns as a kid on early Nickelodeon.
Nickelodeon got ahold of the new one too.
Didn't watch that one.


The Man From Atlantis

The show-

Starring Patrick Duffy as a total ripoff of Aquaman.

And, he's got amnesia like 60's Sub-Mariner.

The history-

My mother swore up and down I liked this as a kid, and that it was Aquaman.
Well, no, it's not Aquaman, and....for the life of me, I can't remember it.


Dr. Who

The show-

Okay, he started in the 60's, but we got him in the states in the 70's/80's.
Hence, me picking Baker.

Covered it okay here..

The history-

See above.


Street Hawk

The show-

A cop, and part time dirt bike rider, joins a secret government project to test a super-duper motorcycle that can go 300 miles an hour, and has computer junk, and weapons.

"Knight Rider", on 2 wheels, and no wisecracking AI, basically.

The history-

...barely remember it.


Starman

The show-

Yes, that's right, that Starman.

So, here, he comes back for his son, and it's nowhere near as messy, and traumatic, and stupid, as XTRO.

Also, for some reason, Karen Allen's character has run out, and disappeared, so, they spend the show looking for her, and never find her, cuz they got cancelled.

Oh, and government goons are always on their tail.

...again with 80's movies and TV hating the government...

...not that you shouldn't, but...are they really twirling their mustaches, and getting boners imagining slaughtering peaceful aliens just to put their fluids in jars?
And if so, why are our taxes going towards this?
What's the pay out?
I don't get it.

The history-

Meh, nothing else was on.


Once A Hero

The show-

Oh! Yes! Remember that one I couldn't remember last time?

Oh, and round about this time, or earlier, there was this one, also a failed pilot, where a superhero inside a comic strip, that knows he's a comic strip, finds a way to fly fast enough to break the reality barrier, and come into our world, then from there, it becomes a sitcom.
I can't find any information on that at all, I can't even remember the title.
If someone remembers, help me out.

Well, this is it!
Man, that was driving me crazy...

And Hyla did sorta help out, he reminded me of another show, that when I Youtubed, had this on the sidebar.
So, hey, cool, thanks, Hyla's luck-powers!

The history-

Pretty much as I described, and critics dug it, the rubes, not so much.
These cool critics must have all retired and died by the time shit like "My So Called Life", and "Gilmore Girls", shat forth...


Sable

The show-

A school teacher is a crime fighter by night.
...and paints his face.

The history-

This is the one that Hyla reminded me of that connected to "Once A Hero".

...don't remember it...remember the comic that went with it, though...


Werewolf

The show-

Oh, man, I'm so sick of mopey fucking vampires, why can't we hit the werewolf part of the cultural cycle again?
And make it soon, please!

Anyway, Werewolf was...a werewolf...I won't bother looking up the character's human name, you won't remember it, and neither will I.

So...he wasn't exactly a help-little-old-ladies-across-the-street superhero, but...he was trying to rid the world of Chuck Connors, even if selfishly to lift his own curse.

And, he was pretty fucking badass looking for 80's TV, as you can see there.

The history-

One of Fox's earliest shows.

This Mike And The Mechanics song was the de-facto theme, and...the radio played it to death, even long after the show ended, but I always thought of it as "The Werewolf Song".

Quantum Leap

The show-

Well, Sam Beckett didn't have powers, a costume, and was a gun-wuss...but...he was a Boy Scout do-gooder, and patched up people's lives, and he was a Don Bellisario creation, so...yeah, let's throw him in.

Plus, he traveled time, so...there's your sci-fi angle.

The history-

Tch...that stupid oblique ending...only "The Sopranos", was worse...christ, I don't even wanna talk about it.


Super Force

The show-

A guy gets an exo-suit like Iron Man, but not as good as Iron Man, like, really on the cheap.

And a super bike, but not as fast as Street Hawk.

And, a billy club that doubles as some kind of raygun.

Aaand....Patrick MacNee's mind is in a computer, and his face is pixelated...yeah, that's a good idea, pixelate your biggest star, Max Headroom didn't need to be pixelated, they just made it far enough into the future where the graphics would be good...meh...

Anyway, this was like, the companion show to Superboy...somehow...guess cuz it had "super", in the title.
Well...so long as they put thought into it....

The history-

Meh...


Time Trax

The show-

Well, it's time travel...but the rules were really stupid.....

Okay, you could travel time, but only backward, and only to the 20th century from the 22nd, and you did it by being baked in this giant microwave, and your molecules had to be perfectly lined up, so you had to take this funky drug that froze your molecules, and because of the side-effects of the drug, you could only go back in time, and come back, a third trip would make you sick, and/or crazy, and a fourth would make you get lost in the time-stream.

So, the plot is, a crooked scientist got paid a bunch of money to send a bunch of criminals back to our time to escape justice, so the dad from "Pet Sematary", gets sent back to give them a second dose of drug to download them back to the future to get sent to jail.

He wields as his main weapon, a car-alarm keychain fob that can shoot blue knockout glowey things, and red glowey things that have the "beam 'em up Scotty", drugs.

There's green glowey things, but I forgot what they do.

Also, he has a credit card that's really an AI computer that projects as a hologram of a chick, but she's plain, and dressed up like a school marm.

The history-

I liked it back then, but just describing it, man, it was stupid...


M.A.N.T.I.S.

The show-

Produced by Sam Raimi.
Before the "Hercules/Xena", days.

So, a black dude (don't get many of those) who's paralyzed,  is also an electronics genius, and builds an exo-skeleton that can make him walk, and then he's like "hey, it just so happens this thing also makes me strong enough to turn people to paste with my bare hands, and the fabric is bullet proof, why not fight crime?".

So, he does.

The history-

Eh, s'alright.
Better than "Super Force".


Dead At 21

The show-

From here.

It was a show on MTV.

Here.

About a guy with a chip in his head that'll kill him when he turns 21, and he's trying to prevent his death, while outrunning government goons.

Whelp, been 16 years with no resolution.
Guess he died.

Government won, and we got Bush and Obama, and there's no more Gulf of Mexico, or New Orleans, or World Trade Center.

All your fault for losing, Ed Bellamy.

Worst superhero ever.

Whelp, at least the end credits of the last episode introduced me to that Alice In Chains song I like.
So, there's that.

Oh, and fuck MTV.

There, that's vented, now we can finally move on....

The history-

Seriously though, this was just awful.
No wonder MTV just gave up, and shat out reality shows....


The Secret World of Alex Mack

The show-

A Nickelodeon thing.
Okay, so this girl gets splashed with chemical waste off of a truck, and gets telekinesis, finger-lightning, and the power to morph into a silver liquid ripped off from T2.

Not only does she keep her powers a secret, she puts up with miserable bullshit from the morons around her.
And, no one in her life isn't an obnoxious twat on some level that could use a zap.
Frustrating show.

Anyway, Jessica Alba, who'll pop up again later, was in it.

The history-

My younger cousins watched it as kids.
Only saw about 3 episodes over their house.
Didn't care for it a bit.
No one makes a good kid show anymore, it's really insulting to our youth.
We should be ashamed.


The Sentinel

The show-

A guy trains his senses to the point he's like a human crime lab.

Sounds better than it was.

The history-

Pppt!


The Pretender

The show-

The Evil Government genetically engineered some genius kids, then, terminated the project, and one of 'em (as an adult) got away, and now he uses his genius to be able to do any job a human being can possibly do, plus disguises, to pose as anybody, to do missions...and stuff.

The history-

Pppt!


NightMan

The show-

No, not the one from "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia".
If only....

No, this one, a mulleted saxophone player dresses up as a ripoff of Batman.
Hijinks ensue.

The history-

PPPPPPPTTT!!!!!


Angel

The show-

Buffy's little spinoff about her little boyfriend.

In the last seasons, her other little boyfriend joined up.

Joss Whedon needs to be taken out back, and beaten with  a tenderizing mallet for this.

The history-

*Brooompt!!*


Heat Vision And Jack

The show-

A parody pilot by Ben Stiller, starring Jack Black, and Owen Wilson, and written by the guy what did "SCUD The Disposable Assasin".

Pretty much a note-perfect mockery of well...all the shit on this list.

So...Jack Black is an astronaut who gets exposed to "inappropriate amounts of solar radiation", and becomes the smartest man in the world, but only in daylight, and The Evil Government wants to remove his brain, so, he tries to escape, and calls his roommate, played by Owen Wilson, to come and get him, and the government stooges try to shoot him (Jack) with an experimental ray, but hit Owen Wilson, and he gets merged with, and becomes, his motorcycle.

"Heat Vision", is the bike, and "Jack", is Jack.

So, they're on the run from Ron Silver, and every town they go to, there's an unusual crime to solve.

The history-

Check it out.

And now, the opening to "Dead At 21".

See the similarities?
Man, you'll never look at TV the same way again....


Dark Angel

The show-

*Yawn* another genetically engineered child escapes from another Evil Government Project...in another future that never happened.

So, this was produced by Jim Cameron, and starred Jessica Alba, who later was in "Fantastic Four", and "Sin City".

And, in that latter one, the little bitch wouldn't flash her titties, even though she was playing a stripper that flashed her titties in the book, and it was an R rated fucking movie.

What did Nickelodeon even breed you for, dammit?
What a waste.
Throw yourself in the rubbish.

The history-

*Mumble grumble*


My Hero

The show-

A British sitcom? In the 00's?
Howcome I just a few days ago heard of this?

Well, it sounds goofy, but it was on for 6 seasons, so, it must've had something going for it....

Anyway, the premise seems to be, imagine if Superman came to Earth as an adult, and not a baby, so he had an extra Starman-ish fish-out-of-water thing going on.

Eh, sounds funny, would have to see it...

The history-

N/A


Black Scorpion (the series)

The show-

Spun off from the Black Scorpion movies.

Forgot to mention, they were Roger Corman jobbies.

Roger is the original Troma.

And...I think that pretty much tells you what you'd be in for with this....

The history-

See above, especially the links.


Jake 2.0

The show-

A guy gets infested with nanites, and gets way less impressive superpowers than you would expect him to get.

The history-

Pppt!


The 4400

The show-

"Close Encounters of the Third Kind", meets "Heroes".

Except, suck out all the joy, ala the new "Battlestar Galactica".

Man, I hated that strain in our culture....

The history-

*Finger*


Chuck

The show-

So, I guess Chuck kinda had, like, sorta-powers.
He had a bunch of programming downloaded into his head that helped him...

The history-

..I never watched this.
Never got into "My Name Is Earl", or "Scrubs", or 30 Rock", or...meh.


Dollhouse

The show-

Yeah, more Whedon crap.
He peaked at Firefly.
He's gotta go away now.

Okay, so...The Evil Government has a bunch of chicks they keep in little garages (I call 'em cubbies) like the Voltron Lions, and they program their brains with false identities, and skills for their missions.

...this is some spooky revolting shit that came out of 9/11 and Bush, this shit of The Evil Government doing worse evil shit than they EVER did in the old shows that HATED the government, but at the same time, seducing us that The Evil Government is working towards The Greater Good, therefore, are our pals.

Um...NO...fuck you.

Fuck. You.

Fuck.
You.

The history-

I hate the cubbies.


And...I think that's got it this time...

Up next...Leftover Movies.