Location blogging #14.

Okay, the wait is over, and I'm all gadgeted up, so back to the navel gazing on what my summer meant.


Whelp, in entry 1, I was gloomily predicting a voyage of the damned through a " tableau of American defeat".

Hmm...all in how one looks at it, I guess.

All throughout, I griped about old places I loved that are gone now, but...they're not really gone...

Bookland was replaced with Borders, Laverdiere's is replaced by Rite Aid/CVS, and comic shops, and the old Wal-Mart is fucking dead, and its horrible mean redneck employees scattered to the four corners of the planet.

And Bookland still exists out in Saco as Nonesuch Books, so there's that.

And Rich's is reincarnated as Big Lots, and the old Biddeford theater never really died.

So, what's gone?
What have I lost?

An old toy store? I'm an adult, I don't need toys anymore.

Oh, well, yes I do. :P

So, okay, the world I thought I'd lost has just rearranged, and morphed, but it's all still there.

And all the people and places I thought were destroyed, what represented "defeat", have just shifted around, and/or gone online.

So, why am I a hermit anymore?

....right...people...

People and their bullshit.

But....how much bullshit do people I contact in daily life really give me?

None, really.

People walking about mind their own business, and people in service jobs tend to be cheery and helpful no matter how rednecky the shop.

So...the only really insufferable criminal redneck pricks I encountered....were on night crews.
Toys R Us, and Wal-Mart.
And ironically, I did night crew to avoid people, to avoid the sort of sociopathy I ended up putting up with anyway.
So...okay, no more night crews.

So, who else gives me shit?
WF, mostly.
Okay, stop going there.
I'm a hermit cuz of assholes, and the assholes in my life are all on a message board that I go to while I'm indoors avoiding people.

Okay, bam, 'nother problem solved.

So, where else is the bullshit coming from?
Okay, our dopey media culture.
But, I found one surefire antidote to that.

So, bam, another problem gone.

And with my remote, and when I get the Dingoo, I'll have to put up with what's shoveled at me even less.

So, what's left?
Phantoms in my head.
Fuck 'em.

And that's one big thing I rediscovered, the "fuck 'em", attitude I learned in the 80's, and didn't used to doubt.
Gotta get back on that wagon, and stay on it.

That "fuck em", attitude was the lens I wrote the last 2 rants in.
(Confidence, accomplishment)

Gotta practice what I preach about defeating fear, and the bullshit that comes from it.

Okay, so what's left?
Any boogeymen?
Whelp...yuppies, I bitched about them a bit (here, here, n' here).
What is a yuppie anyway?
People with money who don't share my tastes?
Big deal.
Get over it, Mikey.
What's the worst a yuppie does? Get snotty about me being white trash once in a blue moon?
Fuck 'em.
It's because they're an asshole as an individual, not because of their bank account.
And how often does that shit even happen?
Can't even remember the last time.
Fuck it.
Shit, lotta my online friends are of that "yuppie class", whatever that even is, so...meh.
Another mental illusion.
Like all teenagers being in a gang.

Paranoid insecurity, I cop to it.

Fine, awareness is the first step.

Gotta let that stupid shit go.

Gotta embrace the world again.

Gotta carve out a damned life somehow.

Well,...I took on the world out there in the location blogs.

Except....in-town Portland....

*Shiver*

(Flash to Portland with a big black cloud monster with red eyes floating over it and laughing)

*Gulp*.....