The citizens of Stratumberg were just dippy about their superhero.
His handle was Comrade Crimson Crossbow, a red garbed Robin Hood knockoff with a wrist mounted crossbow who robbed from the robber barons, and gave to the needy.
Or some-such.
Allegedly.
The local politicos and business criminals hated him.
Usually, a good sign.
When Dusty arrived, people spoke of Comrade Crimson Crossbow openly, and proudly.
Quite a turnaround since the last incident, Dusty reflected.
Perhaps this guy was worth teaming up with, he contemplated.
Maybe Stratumberg had what it took to be Jade-Shade's new home.
But, then he reminded himself, Phidey had the rubes fooled too.
Well, at least he had UN's shield in his arsenal to fend off those little wrist arrows.
It was now spray-painted black with a rough stencil of the JS mask in the middle in metallic green.
If things went south, he had a bit of a chance against CCC.
After getting settled in, JS started going out on his usual patrol hours looking for CCC.
On night four, he found him.
Or, more to the point, CCC found him.
"Hi there!", CCC said in a friendly manner, stepping out from behind a dumpster, his hand extended.
JS had passed this dumpster several times before, CCC had been following and observing him.
JS hesitated, handshakes could be booby-trapped with any number of surprises.
CCC noted this, and said "fair enough, you're right, why trust me?".
JS graveled "you have good press, but good press is easy enough to buy".
CCC chuckled "right indeed, smart man, yes, again, you're right. Well, what do I have to do to satisfy you I'm on your side?".
"I'll know it when I see it", JS muttered.
"How about we go on patrol together, and we can talk along the way?", CCC offered.
JS thought it over for a few moments and said "sure".
So, they went out on patrol.
Stopped a couple muggers.
That felt all right.
Not so much when CCC took the money from a rich old lady's purse gotten back from a snatcher, and gave it to the Salvation Army guy instead.
The night went south from there when CCC started his political yammerings.
He was a little too enamored of scumbags like Guevara, and Chavez, for one.
"What was it with these hippie types, and Guevara?", JS asked himself disgustedly.
Warning phrases like "the cause", and "the greater good", and "the greater glory", and "acceptable speech", started to creep in.
JS figured CCC must have thought he was into this bullshit because of his...disagreement with UN.
When "breaking eggs", and "martyrs", slipped out JS had had enough.
"It's always the same. These fucking people. Ultranational, Comrade Crimson Crossbow, it's all the same", JS gloomed internally.
As he simultaneously hurled UN's shield at CC's head with all of his strength from three feet away.
"Whoops!", he uttered to anyone who happened to witness.
CCC dropped like a sack of potatoes, and started letting out an indescribable goose-bump raising shrieking.
His cheekbone and eye socket were pulverized, and his lower jaw was separated.
As JS casually removed CCC's wrist crossbow, CCC gurgled something, that if JS could have interpreted it, would have been "fascist, running dog, dittohead, blah, blah, blah".
JS assumed as much, and contemplated how the crossbow would look, black, with metallic green bolts.
Fucking awesome is how, he decided.
"Phidippus-Dude, Ultranational, Comrade Crimson Crossbow, they've all been as phony as Peerless Person in their way", JS thought to himself ruefully.
CCC continued shrieking hate at him as he rolled on the ground in agony.
"Y'know, all politicians and their voter dupes are UN or CCC to some degree in their way. That's why I hate politics, and...indeed both mayors back home. Well, that settles it, I can't leave the people alone with that critter, I'm going back home", JS resolved.
JS gave CCC an identical flip-off to UN as he marched away.
CCC eventually passed out.
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2 comments:
Comrade Crimson Crossbow?!? That's awesome. a little play on left-leaning Green Arrow?
Oh, hells yeah. :)
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