Friday, November 29, 2024

So, Freddy, Jason, Ash, Chucky, Pinhead...


I made a tag so I don't have to list the previous ones anymore.

I've pretty much mumbled this sentiment in other posts, but let's make it formal.


The 80's horror era is dead.
I hung onto it for as long as sanely possible, but it's finished.

New Line is never going to do another Freddy with Robert Englund, and he's too old.
They seem contemptuous of doing another Freddy period since the reboot...14 fucking years ago now!
Bruce Campbell has retired Ash.
The Evil Dead franchise is doing rotating protagonists, so we won't get to love any character as much as Ash.
I don't give a flying fuck about solo Jason. I only liked him in crossovers.
The Chucky TV series is cancelled.
The Hellraiser reboot bombed.

Even things that tap into 80's nostalgia are wrapping up.
Stranger Things next season is its last.
American Horror Story moved to streaming, and refuses to do another 80's one anyway.
We're not getting Final Girls 2, or Leslie Vernon 2 anytime soon.
The guys who make Hatchet can go fuck right off.
Ugh. Their podcast made me not like them.
But that franchise seems over too. Good.

Yeah, the wave broke.
It's really over.

The world has moved on to other shit.
Found footage ghosts, mostly.
Possessed toys. Megan.
Yeah, Megan is the new Freddy/Jason/Michael.
And even all that stuff is escapism from the horrors the billionaire class are bound and determined to dish out on the world.
But, maybe horror always was that, and I was naïve.
And then nostalgic for that naiveté.

Yeah, the millennials and alphas can have Megan. I'm done.
I'm an old fart, and my era has ended.
Guess I'll just watch all the old movies, and slowly go insane, like the chick from "Sunset Boulevard".
Don't tell me you don't get that reference, or I'll bust into tears.
Google, ya little bastids.

Ch-ch-ch, ha-ha-ha....

Shut up, Jason.
Goddammit....



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