Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Quantum Dissolve: Chapter Nineteen. (Streetsweepers vs. Tomahawk-Fuzz)

He announced himself to the world openly and abruptly.
Dressed up in police attire, mustached, and marching down the street swinging a tomahawk around screaming "I will slice your noggin off!!".

Every now and then, he would twitch in confusion, as if listening to voices only he could hear.

JS and Chokecherry were at the scene almost immediately.

Tomahawk-Fuzz had ahold of someone's scalp, and had the blade held ready to strike.

JS tazed him in the back of the neck.
His victim escaped.

As JS tied him up with zip ties, Chokecherry noticed the bluetooth earpiece Tomahawk-Fuzz was wearing, and quickly deduced someone was instructing him.

JS went back to the car, and dug out the wi-fi tracing equipment they'd just looted off the Transposer robot a couple days prior.

Chokecherry slipped the tomahawk into her handbag while no one was looking.

After a few minutes using the tracer, they found the person commanding Tomawk-Fuzz in a hotel room just a block away, and it was....a 6 year old boy.
Chokecherry knocked him out with a chloroform rag.
They found the boy was wearing two bluetooths.
One to send, the other to receive.
Someone was using the kid as a relay.
"Despicable", JS grumbled.

They traced the second signal to a room just down the hallway.
"Stupid", Chokecherry grumbled as JS kicked in the door.
It was a fat hairy guy.
JS was not merciful.
The beating savage, but quick, the recipient, pathetic.

All they found on him besides the cellphone gear, was a crucifix, and a copy of C.S. Lewis's "Mere Christianity".

They both shook their heads in contemptuous annoyance.

"Another Hadesburster", JS thought to himself.
Dragging the kid into it was a new low though.
"Well, you're gonna see a lot of horrible shit in this line of work", he figured.

JS finished tying up the fat guy, and set about leaving him and Tomahawk-Fuzz, whomever he really was, as a combo package for the cops.

Meanwhile, Chokecherry took the kid to be taken care of by friends of hers.

A pair of lesbians.
Asian lesbains.
Who voted for Obama.

Turned out to be the best thing for everybody.


Hyla Tracy II said...

HA! Literal LOL.

Glorious punchline on this one.


Hyla Tracy II said...

It actually took me until the fat hairy guy to realize you were targeting Axe Cop; my initial assumption was Savage Dragon.

Y'know, cop uniform, moustache (he had one for awhile) and, well I figured: fin-mohawk = mohawk = Native American Mohawk Tribe = fin-mohawk exchanged for tomahawk for clever satirical purposes.


Tried too hard and shot right past it.

Doofus = me. ;P

Diacanu said...

Oddly enough, Savage Dragon is not on the list.

Hmm....should he be?

Blog Archive