Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Franken-fest (Part 6)


As with Dracula, Frankensein's Monster made enough of a cultural impact to inspire parody and lampoon.
These are those.


Young Frankenstein (1974)


The film-

Yep, this, "Blazing Saddles", "The Producers", and "Spaceballs", put 'em in the Louvre.

Not only funny as a bastid, but totally nails the style of the old Universals from top to bottom.

The history-

This flick is one year older than me, so, I never remember a time without it.


The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)


The film-

Yeah, you gotta be beyond Amish, you gotta be like, from some rainforest tribe, to not know this one.

This has totally become a perennial Halloween thing, whether you've actually seen the movie or not, you know someone, or know someone who knows someone, who's done the whole dress-up screening thing.

So, yeah, you got Dr. Frankenfurter, you got Rocky as his creature, that qualifies.

The history-

This took a long time to come to home video.

I remember grainy flea market bootlegs of this, and Heavy Metal floating around.
No, it was this, Heavy Metal, and Star Trek Bloopers.

Those were the three rarest flicks on Earth back in the early 90's.

Now, it's just Star Trek Bloopers.

Of the three actual broads in this, my boner-crush is for Columbia, the squeaky redhead.
Probably a holdover from my Cyndi Lauper crush.

Hyla's was Susan Sarandon, I believe.

So...does that mean Spencer wanted to bang Magenta?
He's never going to contradict me, so, let's just say yes.
;)


Death Race 2000 (1975)


The film-

See here.

Man, "Rocky Horror", this, "Salo", some fucked up flicks heralded my birth.
Is it any wonder I'm like this?

Anyway, David Carradine's character is "Frankenstein", based on The Monster.

The racers have characters like wrestlers, and his deal, is he's allegedly stitched together after surviving lots of accidents.
It's fake though, he just wears a burn mask, and a Darth Vader sort of suit.

Hey, I wonder if Lucas ripped it off.
Well...he's a ripoff artist, so, no doubt.

Man, given how Carradine died, that puts a new layer of weird over everything he did.

Oh, sorry, did I get too morbid for...Hallo-fucking-ween?

The history-

Here's some lines you never thought you'd hear....

(Stadium crowd) "Frankenstein! Frankenstein! Frankenstein!".

(Interviewer) "We LOVE you, President Frankenstein!".


Frankenweenie (1984)


The film-

Well, you know the story, cuz the remake is out in theaters now.

Kid Frankensteins his doggie back to life.

Tim Burton was fired from Disney for making this, they said it was too dark for kids.

Then, the very next fucking year, they made "One Magic Christmas".

Fuck you, Disney.

The history-

Haven't seen it.
Sorry.
I slacked off there.


Weird Science (1985)


The film-

See here.

So, not only is Lisa an artificial creation in a similar vein to "Frankenstein", they beat you over the head with it, with repeated clips from "Bride Of Frankenstein", and a sampling of "she's alive!", right in Oingo Boingo's "Weird Science", song.

And, as if the hairdos and clothes don't date this enough, it's the shitty colorized version of "Bride".

Yeah, colorization, brilliant idea, 80's.
It only looked like total shit. Like a child went through with crayons.
Glad that fad is gone.

Oh, and you know who fought colorization tooth and nail back in the day?
George Lucas.
Yeah, that gives one spooky metaphysical pause.

The history-

Same as last time.


Frankenhooker (1990)


The film-

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

Oh shit! Ahahahaa! It's 22 fucking years later, and it still cracks me up!

Look at it!

AAAAHAHAHAAA!!!

And the actual movie is even better!

So, the protagonist's girlfriend gets mangled by a freak lawnmower accident, and he saves her head, and keeps it in a freezer, and then creates "super crack", and gives it to these hookers, and the crack is so strong, they fucking explode, hahahhaa! and..and then, he picks up their parts, and brings them home, and builds Frankenhooker, and then, being mostly hooker, his precious little girlfriend goes out, and starts walking the streets, and everyone she fucks...hahaha.....gets electrified by her pussy like it's a light socket...hahhahaha...and explodes like the hookers...ahhahahhaa... and..and..one of the guys severed heads go "oooohhh thaaat was wooonderful", ahahahahaaa!!!!!

*Coughing fit, gasps*

The history-

See above.


Waxwork II (1992)


The film-

More of an outright comedy than the first one.

Also, Frankenstein's Monster is in this one.

He's just a wax dummy in the first one.

The history-

I gotta watch this again to refresh my memory.



Matthew Blackheart: 
Monster Smasher (2002)



The film/history-

See here.

Yeah, he was rebuilt from parts, so, he counts.

Hey, there's a comic for someone to make!
Matthew Blackheart vs. Frankenstein, Agent Of S.H.A.D.E!
Eh? Eh?
You know you want it!


Okay, now, the reruns from The Dracula one....


The Munsters (1964-1966)


The show/history-

Natch.

So, Mike Frankenstein was going incognito as "Herman Munster".
CIA cover, I guess.


Munster, Go Home (1966)


The film/history-

Ditto.


The Munsters' Revenge (1981)


The film/history-

Double ditto.


The Halloween That Almost Wasn't (1979)


The film/history-

SCHLOCK!!!


The Monster Squad (1987)


The film/history-

See here, and here.

So, yeah, like I said there, given that the Universal monster-mashes were actually weak-sauce, this really is the best (live-action) one.

Anyway, The Monster is one of the good guys in this one.

Neat bit of trivia I stumbled onto, and didn't know until now.
Dracula in this was also 90's TV Zorro.


Waxwork (1988)


The film/history-

Meh, said it all last time.


There, that went quick.

Up next, Frankenstein's Monster in animation.

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