Monday, May 10, 2010

Postcards from Podsville #29.98.

The real world.

People love to beat you over the head with this phrase, don't they?

Well, I'm pleased to report after much meditation, that there is none.
So lift your head.

I mean, given the existence of bullshit like religion, never mind the bullshit barely gluing the economy together, and the everyday bullshit people use to cope with the day to day, despite the spiel we get about honesty growing up, plus partisan politics, and the "philosophies", those idiot head-butting factions rest on, and....whaddya got?

A bunch of stuff people made up.

But, as I said in a previous rant, this is as real as it gets.

S'all there is.

S'all they got for ya.


Well, not ALL there is.

There's Podsville, and the third world.

And the legion of sociopaths, and they can move to any square on the board, so they're not tied down to a"world".
But, they're a minority.

And then there's us weirdos.

And that's it.

Well, the third world is pretty damned real.
And prison.
Hmm, add up all the prisons, you'd have a decent sized country.
What would you call that, the fourth world?

Yeah, no one wants to live in the third and fourth worlds.
Not even snarky wiseasses like me.

Betcha inmates miss Podsville.

But...people who utter "something, something, out in the real world, bucko", probably don't mean prison.

They mean that "dog eat dog", shit in Podsville.
Y'know, the stuff people have to bullshit themselves and each other about to cope with.

So, it's really a euphemism for "outside your door, people are lying, thieving, backstabbing, greedy pricks".

Well, no shit.

Too much of the thieving greedy stuff, and then THEY'LL be the ones to be acquainted with the REAL real world.
The fourth world.
Special camp.

Wonder if there's Forbes style coping strategies for prison.
"Tell yourself your rapist had a really bad day, it doesn't matter if it's true or not....".
Eh, I bet not.

So, okay, Podsville is really sort of a mix between a mega-minimum security prison, and Dave & Busters.
Sort of a human habitrail.


I'm just annoyed that you're not told the score, and that there has to be all the brainwashing shit.
The herding.

But, only weirdos seem to be annoyed.
A lot of people seem to think it's all peachy keen.
Or, maybe not.
Maybe weirdos aren't as uncommon as I thought....
Scan the larger blogosphere, and there's a lot of misanthropic misfits out there.

So...whence then this "real world"?

I keep looking for it, can't find it.

For something as pervasive as a WORLD, you'd think it wouldn't be small enough to lose.

Yeah, I'm done looking.
If it turns up behind your couch, lemme know.

Otherwise, I'm gonna go ahead, and assume "blah, blah, blah, real world", is a fear based "motivation", to stay out of prison, and not be homeless, oh, I mean, "to contribute to society".

Yhep, 'nother euphemism for the pile.

Well, there's a coping strategy for ya.
Next time someone throws "the real world", at ya, take them at their word, and assume they mean a Turkish prison.

"Here in the Turkish prison, we have something called 'responsibilities'!!".

Assume they mean salad tossing, you won't be far off.

Speaking of "the real world", is that horrible show still on?
No, don't tell me, I don't need more to get gloomy about....

Okay, y'know what's really real?
Get out in the woods, or out in a field now and then, folks.
That'll get your hardrive back to factory condition.

Then come back, and see how "real", you think humanity's shit is.

Yeah, you won't see "the real world", the show in the woods.
Just as well.

Now, a Turkish prison, that'd be a good season.
I'd un-delete MTV from my channels if that happened.
Talk about a laugh riot.

Don't look for it to happen though.

That shit's for premium cable.
Gotta pay extra for the fourth world.

The third world though, they'll put that right on the network news for ya.
They mop up all the guts first though.

The entrails, that's for the dogfood commercials.
Now there's "dog eat dog".

Everything in it's place.


Like a habitrail.

Sealed off from the real world.
And pumped full of corn syrup and fry oil.

God bless America.


Paladin said...

You know I think your worldview is very distorted, but damn it, the bit about strategies for coping with prison rape really made me laugh.

Diacanu said...

Well, thanks.
Looks like I've still got it then.

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