Saturday, October 16, 2010

Okay, look, this is bugging me...

Madonna can't sing, okay?

She literally can't sing.

The emperor has no clothes.

Okay, when she was fresh-faced back in the 80's she had a strong set
of pipes, and could hit those piercing high notes.

Go ahead, go over to Youtube, listen to "crazy for you", or
"borderline", or "burning up".

Real voice, right?

But then, about the time of "open your heart", you can hear a crack in her voice, the glass-cracking high notes are gone.

Then, by "like a prayer", the high-voiced Madonna is totally gone,
she's compensating with low notes like she's doing an Elvis
impression.

But then, by "justify my love", even that's all gone, she's just
talking, and panting like an obscene phone call.

And when she does "sing", the "songs", are meaningless fluff that any
little bimbo you could kidnap out of a mall parking lot could sing
them.
It's all little snippets, edited to shit, harmonizers pushing her
voice, background singers, synth solos, no actual SONG.

Skip ahead, "die another day", she's totally computerized.

Madonna can't sing.

Her one claim to fame totally died back in 89-90.

She coasted on her tits and twat the rest of the way.

It's all fake, people.

Now, I dunno if she blew out her vocal chords singing too much, too
hard, or from gargling whole bouqets of cock, I don't need to know.

All I know is people bought into a fraud.

And okay, so what, Madonna's all washed up, why complain now?

Cuz it's all gonna happen again.

She's already priming her daughter to be her clone.

It's all gonna happen again.

Don't buy the albums, people, don't buy them!
No matter how much your daughters and granddaughter cry!
Don't do it!

We can stop it this time!
We can stop it!

We can save a generation!

*Eyes well up*

We can do it...we can stop it this time...if only you'd listen...if
only you'd listen....*collapses*

Update-
My friend, Laurie, informs me she was ALWAYS fake!

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